To Male “Allies” and “Feminists”

Men, 

I am not going to give you kudos for never having raped a person (especially since far more men have than think they have or will admit it). I am not going to give you kudos for never having abused someone. You don’t get points for being a basic human being.

If you want me to assume that you’re anything more than an average rape apologist and misogynist who may or may not occasionally pay lip service to equality by saying you’re a feminist or sharing an Upworthy link, you’re going to have to do a lot more. 

Don’t expect places in female-dominated feminist spaces. Take your own majority of the world and make it feminist.

Don’t talk over women. 

Don’t silence women.

Call other men out on sexist behavior, speech, and attitudes. Call yourself out on the same.

Research. Read writing by feminists. Listen to feminist podcasts. You have the internet at your fingertips, so stop demanding answers and start finding them for yourselves. EDUCATE YOURSELVES.

Accept that losing your relative privilege over women does NOT mean that you are oppressed or losing your rights. That’s how equality works. Everyone gets the same. That means you don’t get it all anymore. 

There’s so much more, but those are starting points.

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